Life and Living

There comes a time in life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good. So, love the people who treat you right...pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is part of LIFE, getting back up is LIVING. (Anonymous)

This is a long one so take a potty break,go get a snack, and get comfortable.

I have been contemplating this post for quite some time and then I found this quote...actually it found me and I thought it summed up alot of what I have been feeling lately. 

In December of 2008 I had the opportunity to have some conversations with family members here in Idaho Falls.  In this said conversation things were said that made me uncomfortable but I kept my mouth shut to them about it.  My family and I were also at this time invited to join these same family members in September to go to a cabin that they had reserved.  I thought it would be great fun and agreed. When I came home very late that night I got into bed with Jef and told him the things that were said and how angry/hurt/upset/mad they made me.  He told me not to get involved...but I felt like I was all ready involved by knowing these things were said, I felt like I had no "out."  I had committed to send an email to all extended family proposing some changes in our family reunion during the 4th of July so I began formulating my thoughts and did what I had committed to do.

Fast forward to September 2009.  My sister's husband died of cancer the first week of September.  At the funeral I asked the family that had invited my little family to this campout if Wendy and Kady could join us, and I was told yes, and "wow" what a great idea to invite her along that would be fun have her.  So that is what I did and she agreed.  The campout was exactly 2 and a half weeks later.  She drove to my house and because my older boys had football, Wendy, Kady, Ella, Cole and I drove up the cabin.  It is about an hour from my house.  We had a nice dinner and everything was going great.  Wendy ran into some emotions that really got her down and she wanted to go home, but would wait till morning so the next day after lunch I drove her back to Idaho Falls and she drove home and Jef and I and the kids went back up to the cabin.  It was a nice weekend and my kids really had a great time with their cousins.

Fast forward about a week.  Grandma's birthday is approaching and my Aunt from Wy called and we were chatting.  She had asked what we had been up too and I was telling her.  I told her about going to this cabin with family (whom she is related to as well.)  In the course of talking she asked why this wasn't a whole family thing (meaning extended family as well) since I was invited and so was Wendy and also some inlaws of the family on the other side.  I know I can be pretty honest with my Aunt so I told her some of the conversation that had happened way back in December of 2008 (those things that made me upset knowing.) 
So I guess this is where I tell you what was said....When conversating about the 4th of July activities and this weekend in September it was said that it would be nice to have a family reunion at this cabin but since it was church property it was a no go since we have family members who smoke and drink and "you know that would just make them uncomfortable."  Now some of you may wonder whay this would bother me so bad....my dad smokes.  I believe when this was said my dad never came once into their thoughts I believe they were meaning my Aunt in Wy and my Uncle in Moscow and some other cousins. 

Now back to the conversation with my Aunt in Wy....I did not say to her "You were not invited because you smoke and drink..haha and guess who said that?"  It came out very honest and matter of fact but she all ready knew who said it and why...it has been an issue between them before.  In th course of the conversation we talk out what was said and yada yada yada...  She then tells me she spoke to her mother, my grandma, and she never even brought up she had been out and about anywhere.  My Aunt very specifically asked her if she had done anything fun and Grandma told her no.  So now my Aunt is thinking, Wow my mom just lied to me about what she had been up too.  A lie of ommision. 
Fast forward about a week (and now it is about a week before Gma's birthday) and my Aunt in Wy writes on her Facebook "Not invited to a family function because I smoke and drink"  All HELL breaks loose in the family and I am at the center of it.  People who were at this campout respond immedietly "what are you talking about?"  And a family member in Idaho Falls calls me and asks if I told her anything and I admit to telling the Aunt in Wy about our campout and yes I told her that she was not invited because that is what I understood from the conversation way back in December.  I was told I misunderstood and yes the comment was said but it was meant about a 4th of July activity and not for this September activity and I was ONLY invited to the September campout because I live in Idaho Falls and Wendy was ONLY invited because I asked for her to be, and same with the other inlaws from other side of family.  In the course of a couple of hours I was called a liar on FB (but not named specifically.)  The actual comment was "whoever told you that is a big LIAR and does not know what they are talking about!!!"  So now I am a liar. 

I will leave you with this today...why would I lie about something that would so deeply hurt me, my kids, my grandma, my Aunt in Wy?  WHAT do/did I have to gain from that lie?

Many more posts to follow and what has happened since this day on October of 2009!

Please comment of what you think so far.  Please Please especially if you are one of those family members involved.